there come these moments in life... when you are fully there and only there with all you got.
a participant as much as an observer. sucked in the moment you watch it unfold before you and it's caught in your mind forever. in that moment there is no time, no tomorrow nor yesterday, no thoughts no worries no longing no sorrows. no memory, no consciousness nothing beyond this moment. these are my moments of pure, solid happiness, th emoments i "forget myself".
this afternoon a friend and i we were having coffee by the river.
it had been sunny and now rain clouds were approaching from the distance.
it was perfect temperature, warm and cool, perfect light, enough to see all the different colours of the sky, the river, the distance, the people without blinding sun smudging the edge of things, a sharp balance of colour and form.
i sighed out: ah, this is my perfect weather.
the two young girls sitting behind us on the river bank got up to greet their friend who just arrived on his bike.
i could smell my suncream on my skin and my friend's citrusy perfume, i could hear the river splashing down over the damm behind us and my friend who'd been picking on my guitar was wondering aloud whether quantanamero is in minor or major.
the group of students in wide trousers that had just occupied the bench-style table opposite us lit up cigarettes -not hand rolled to my surprise.
a girl in a denim skirt walked leisurely by, turning to call lovingly (although pretending to be strict) on her little chihuaua, who stood to sniffle at tree, to hurry up.
a guy in tank top and shorts run by with amazing spring on his legs. three more guys followed revealing the four of them as a running group.
another guy with whooping long blonde dreads rode by on his bike in slow motion as the turkish waiter collected my empty coffee cup from our red tin table.
...............
a little later we got up and headed to the station through the park. there was a little fork way and i started shouting *"which way to the station?! which way to the station!? it's me, gloria! i left the keys on the table, next to the fruit!" we went two steps in one direction and two in the other again and again till we decided to take the left path. had we chosen the other one we would have missed a breeze from our right that blew a rain of pollen from the chestnut trees on us and we bravely walked through it with open arms screeching at how beautiful this was!
--------
today was pure happiness, to the last drop.
*famous scene from roberto benigni's little devil.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Thursday, May 06, 2010
eliminating bad habits, one thing at a time (one a year? lol)
Today is the day i decided to quit sugar. The plan is to stick to that for the next three months, afterwards I'll probably decide it is ok to eat the occasional sweets like at birthdays and such. Hey, I want to eat my cake on my birthday :) then again, maybe I won't. no idea.
almost a year ago, end of may 2009, i quit smoking. i got up that day and i said: from today i am a non-smoker. and since that day i haven't smoked and i never, ever want to smoke cigarettes again. quitting smoking was a quite easy task, sugar shouldn't be a problem, either.
---i craved jam for breakfast, and i craved sugar over my strawberries, but it really is not that bad, things taste fine without sugar, too. i am totally sure that sugar is an addictive, at least for me it is. i rarely drink coffee anyway but from now on i shall drink it without sugar. also all kinds of sweets and cakes and sugary things are out at least until august...---
vegan diet is going pretty well, too, i'm not too harsh with myself. there is still some meat and some fish in the freezer which need to be used up soon, and there are still a couple sachets of ready soup in the pantry that contain milk powder. there is yogurts and cheese in the fridge which my flatmate eats, he eats the yogurts in between meals and he grates cheese over almost every vegan meal i make... the target is that after a while he will get used to the fridge and the pantry having only vegan stuff while he can still eat his meat and cheese outside the flat...
today we had a bean curry over risotto for lunch, and pasta with asparagus for dinner. both very yummy.
almost a year ago, end of may 2009, i quit smoking. i got up that day and i said: from today i am a non-smoker. and since that day i haven't smoked and i never, ever want to smoke cigarettes again. quitting smoking was a quite easy task, sugar shouldn't be a problem, either.
---i craved jam for breakfast, and i craved sugar over my strawberries, but it really is not that bad, things taste fine without sugar, too. i am totally sure that sugar is an addictive, at least for me it is. i rarely drink coffee anyway but from now on i shall drink it without sugar. also all kinds of sweets and cakes and sugary things are out at least until august...---
vegan diet is going pretty well, too, i'm not too harsh with myself. there is still some meat and some fish in the freezer which need to be used up soon, and there are still a couple sachets of ready soup in the pantry that contain milk powder. there is yogurts and cheese in the fridge which my flatmate eats, he eats the yogurts in between meals and he grates cheese over almost every vegan meal i make... the target is that after a while he will get used to the fridge and the pantry having only vegan stuff while he can still eat his meat and cheese outside the flat...
today we had a bean curry over risotto for lunch, and pasta with asparagus for dinner. both very yummy.
Monday, May 03, 2010
originally posted 28 sept 2006
No idea where I had first read this and copied it, but I stumbled over it again today.
------------
A TASTE OF WISDOM
An aging master grew tired of his apprentice complaining, and so, one morning, sent him for some salt. When the apprentice returned, the master instructed the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt in a glass of water and then to drink it.
"How does it taste?" the master asked.
"Bitter," spit the apprentice.
The master chuckled and then asked the young man to take the same handful of salt and put it in the lake. The two walked in silence to the nearby lake, and once the apprentice swirled his handful of salt in the water, the old man said, "Now drink from the lake."
As the water dripped down the young man's chin, the master asked, "How does it taste?"
"Fresh," remarked the apprentice.
"Do you taste the salt?" asked the master.
"No," said the young man.
At this, the master sat beside this serious young man who so reminded him of himself and took his hands, offering:
"The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains the exactly the same. However, the amount of bitterness we taste depends on the container we put the pain in. So when you are in pain, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things . . . Stop being a glass. Become a lake."
----------------
three and a half years later, i can understand this much better.
------------
A TASTE OF WISDOM
An aging master grew tired of his apprentice complaining, and so, one morning, sent him for some salt. When the apprentice returned, the master instructed the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt in a glass of water and then to drink it.
"How does it taste?" the master asked.
"Bitter," spit the apprentice.
The master chuckled and then asked the young man to take the same handful of salt and put it in the lake. The two walked in silence to the nearby lake, and once the apprentice swirled his handful of salt in the water, the old man said, "Now drink from the lake."
As the water dripped down the young man's chin, the master asked, "How does it taste?"
"Fresh," remarked the apprentice.
"Do you taste the salt?" asked the master.
"No," said the young man.
At this, the master sat beside this serious young man who so reminded him of himself and took his hands, offering:
"The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains the exactly the same. However, the amount of bitterness we taste depends on the container we put the pain in. So when you are in pain, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things . . . Stop being a glass. Become a lake."
----------------
three and a half years later, i can understand this much better.
So, go ahead
"The only way you can understand the real meaning and purpose of love is to be willing to pay the price. You have to go out there and risk sharing it. "
from "Chicken Soup for the Soul"
from "Chicken Soup for the Soul"
on standing and falling
on standing and falling
originally posted on vsv.shoe.org on december 24th 2007 while in juneau, alaska
I think we sometimes try so hard not to fall that it would be much easier to let go and fall and just get right up again. i dont know what it is that we fear so much about falling but it aint that bad really. the fear is bigger than the actual pain.
PS. i was out with The Dog today. it was icy and slippery and I got a little braver and a little wiser because I lost my balance and I tried so hard not to fall, and then it dawned on me that I better just fall than hurt myself trying not to. and you know what I let myself fall and just got right back up again and it was no big deal and it was actually kinda fun. oh, and The Dog loved it, too.
originally posted on vsv.shoe.org on december 24th 2007 while in juneau, alaska
I think we sometimes try so hard not to fall that it would be much easier to let go and fall and just get right up again. i dont know what it is that we fear so much about falling but it aint that bad really. the fear is bigger than the actual pain.
PS. i was out with The Dog today. it was icy and slippery and I got a little braver and a little wiser because I lost my balance and I tried so hard not to fall, and then it dawned on me that I better just fall than hurt myself trying not to. and you know what I let myself fall and just got right back up again and it was no big deal and it was actually kinda fun. oh, and The Dog loved it, too.
changing nature
originally posted 26th December 07 in Juneau, Alaska
changing nature
-why have I come to be afraid of water all of a sudden?
-cos you ve become fire. spiting fire...
changing nature
-why have I come to be afraid of water all of a sudden?
-cos you ve become fire. spiting fire...
Sunday, May 02, 2010
dear friend,
I wish I knew a magic spell to make you see how worthy you are of your own compassion and self love for the times you needed it most and for everyday.
You know, just because you have been naive, or soft, or vunerable, does not mean they had the right to go ahead and use you. You wouldn't hurt someone just because you could, would you?!
The way I answer to my critical self when thoughts like these arrive is "I still had lessons to learn" So, it wasn't your fault either, you weren't in a position to protect yourself yet! You still had things to learn.
Kick out the self judging to make space for the lessons.
And concentrate on now: These times are gone and things have already happened. The question is, what can you get out of it? How will you protect yourself next time? Trust your intution? Put yourself first? Learn to say no, draw the line, make yourself heard, remove yourself at the first signs of an unpleasant situation? (for me a great help was to take a wen-do class)
I only know how I came to forgive and love myself, which took a long time and was painful, but I can tell you, since that click happened I have not let people treat me badly or use my friendship, in fact I have removed several people from my life who I felt were either sucking the life out of me or simply were no enrichment at all. I did it without guilt - my resources and my time are not only finite but also very valuable to me.
How about your time and resources?
Every time you do not put up with situations and people, what you do in fact is to give a mental shout to yourself: I love you! And I am here to protect you.
I know from my own experience that I can "change the past" by changing the way I see it in the present. And seing pain and "mistakes" or "failures" as opportunities to learn and grow has been the turning point for me.
Also, maybe an idea is to try out reiki or some other form of healing energy and see if that is a method that agrees with you. Then you or an energy therapist can send this healing energy to yourself in the past, as a child, or as an adult in abusive relationships. I know this sounds like a heap of bogus to a lot of people and that's fine - whether is it a healing energy itself or a placebo effect, with me it has worked, and that's what matters. Abuse hardly enters my thoughts nowadays.
You take the responsibility for yourself, but you leave the judgement.
So, that is what I could come up with for today.
Have a blessed night
Thursday, April 29, 2010
the chicken and the egg
i was in the shower yesterday and i was thinking, or rather feeling.
is it not unfair, that women have the gift of loving their child, that has come out of them.
this all conquering love that can transform a woman into a lioness, a wolf mother... i know when one day i have my child and somebody tries to hurt it... they are dead meat. shredded dead meat. i shall grow claws and fangs and rip them apart without further thoughts...
which gift do men have in this case?
and then it hit me.
they have the gift of loving their child just as deeply, that (even if) has not come out them.
as for the actual chicken and egg question, i can't be bothered. I am vegan!
is it not unfair, that women have the gift of loving their child, that has come out of them.
this all conquering love that can transform a woman into a lioness, a wolf mother... i know when one day i have my child and somebody tries to hurt it... they are dead meat. shredded dead meat. i shall grow claws and fangs and rip them apart without further thoughts...
which gift do men have in this case?
and then it hit me.
they have the gift of loving their child just as deeply, that (even if) has not come out them.
as for the actual chicken and egg question, i can't be bothered. I am vegan!
do people come with an x button so you can delete them from your life?
it's been a year now that i decided to make my life lighter. i started with my home and my belongings and have eliminated a lot of "garbage" mostly by detecting false needs... this has been going well.
then i started to eliminate garbage in form of thoughts and feelings, my online itneractions.
then activities, obligations, more false needs and things that wasted my time and energy.
now it is time to move on to people in my life.
i have been thinking about eliminating some *friends* who just don't feel good. one friend sucks the life out of me with his neediness, another exhausts me with his misogyny, even if it is subconscious... i think i will simply keep myself away from them, avoid seeing them and such. i ve been keeping a gossiping control freak out of my life for several months now and i successfully "deleted" an ex a few weeks ago.
my criterium for knowing who i need to chuck out is how i feel when im having an exchange with them, as well as when i'm not.
sometimes i get an unpleasant feeling, as if the person is jealous of me in a way and doesn't really wish me well, or trying to control me, or feels free to "correct" something about me when i haven't given that permission... with the people i feel good with, these corrections are most welcome and appreciated. with the others, they feel like annoying intrusions/invasions to my personality... maybe because they come from a need to prove themselves as better, than from interest for my improvement and development.
sometimes communication is simply odd, i'm not sure the person is listening, by a seemingly odd response, or they listen but their social skills are somehow... not on the same wavelength as mine. for example when i say "i got this such and such diagnosis from the doctor and now i have to take this pill and do so and so" and the person just ignores what i said, instead of offering a simple "oh, i'm sorry darling, hope you're not in pain" something simple that shows, i aknowledge what you say, and i feel with you.
or when i have a friend who will only talk about themselves and their problems for two hours straight, every time i see them, without as much as "hey, and what have you been up to?" i totally understand that a friend can be like that at times, and that's ok, but if they are like that all the time, then they need probably a psychologist for it and not a friend.
the opposite can also feel weird. when someone only wants to hear about you, but they never share anything about themselves. when you ask them something they give you a vague or general answer and turn the focus back to you.
or people that are constantly "pill-happy". i don't know what else to name this condition, and I know i am a very joyful person myself, with good amounts of energy. it's just that there are people whose happiness doesnt feel so genuine to me, or it feels kinda "pushed", as if they are making themselves "sound" and "show" happy rather than be happy. it can get very tiring, too.
and then i also realise i don't want some people as friends, because when they are away on vacation or they haven't called in a while i don't miss them at all, they hardly come up in my thoughts in fact. and it gets even worse because when they do call, i might even get an irritated feeling like "oh, it's you... i don't feel like speaking to you now" or... "oh, you... i had forgotten you exist..." but of course saying something like this would be very rude and hurtful...
i wonder do i need to tell these people why i do not wish contact any more? the thing is, i have sort of tried in a nice way but it didn't work. the message didn't get across, and when i was more direct about it, they got cross. i don't particularly mind what they think of me "know-better-bitch?" but harsh concepts/criticism to one's person and behaviour can hurt... even if they are put in neutral words. especially when I know that this person has some problems with themselves, like not feeling as good as everybody else, then it sort of puts a greater responsibility on me to be even kinder with them?
but then again, if i want to treat all people as equal, why should i make exceptions for them? maybe it is time for them to simply grow up? and maybe it has nothing to do with them at all, and it is about me?
i think feeling inferior or feeling superior are two sides of the same coin: you feel somehow different than the rest of the world. it is a failure to aknowledge that you are just like everybody else, and you could be anyone else. and if i treat people differently, i will reinforce this belief in them.
all this elimination of garbage has made a lot of space for many new, good, happy things. good luck, love, happiness, contentness, wonderful new people and many many lessons and moments of insight have been coming to me. i think they have been coming because i have been inviting them to do so, and trying to keep my eyes, my ears my heart open for them.
then i started to eliminate garbage in form of thoughts and feelings, my online itneractions.
then activities, obligations, more false needs and things that wasted my time and energy.
now it is time to move on to people in my life.
i have been thinking about eliminating some *friends* who just don't feel good. one friend sucks the life out of me with his neediness, another exhausts me with his misogyny, even if it is subconscious... i think i will simply keep myself away from them, avoid seeing them and such. i ve been keeping a gossiping control freak out of my life for several months now and i successfully "deleted" an ex a few weeks ago.
my criterium for knowing who i need to chuck out is how i feel when im having an exchange with them, as well as when i'm not.
sometimes i get an unpleasant feeling, as if the person is jealous of me in a way and doesn't really wish me well, or trying to control me, or feels free to "correct" something about me when i haven't given that permission... with the people i feel good with, these corrections are most welcome and appreciated. with the others, they feel like annoying intrusions/invasions to my personality... maybe because they come from a need to prove themselves as better, than from interest for my improvement and development.
sometimes communication is simply odd, i'm not sure the person is listening, by a seemingly odd response, or they listen but their social skills are somehow... not on the same wavelength as mine. for example when i say "i got this such and such diagnosis from the doctor and now i have to take this pill and do so and so" and the person just ignores what i said, instead of offering a simple "oh, i'm sorry darling, hope you're not in pain" something simple that shows, i aknowledge what you say, and i feel with you.
or when i have a friend who will only talk about themselves and their problems for two hours straight, every time i see them, without as much as "hey, and what have you been up to?" i totally understand that a friend can be like that at times, and that's ok, but if they are like that all the time, then they need probably a psychologist for it and not a friend.
the opposite can also feel weird. when someone only wants to hear about you, but they never share anything about themselves. when you ask them something they give you a vague or general answer and turn the focus back to you.
or people that are constantly "pill-happy". i don't know what else to name this condition, and I know i am a very joyful person myself, with good amounts of energy. it's just that there are people whose happiness doesnt feel so genuine to me, or it feels kinda "pushed", as if they are making themselves "sound" and "show" happy rather than be happy. it can get very tiring, too.
and then i also realise i don't want some people as friends, because when they are away on vacation or they haven't called in a while i don't miss them at all, they hardly come up in my thoughts in fact. and it gets even worse because when they do call, i might even get an irritated feeling like "oh, it's you... i don't feel like speaking to you now" or... "oh, you... i had forgotten you exist..." but of course saying something like this would be very rude and hurtful...
i wonder do i need to tell these people why i do not wish contact any more? the thing is, i have sort of tried in a nice way but it didn't work. the message didn't get across, and when i was more direct about it, they got cross. i don't particularly mind what they think of me "know-better-bitch?" but harsh concepts/criticism to one's person and behaviour can hurt... even if they are put in neutral words. especially when I know that this person has some problems with themselves, like not feeling as good as everybody else, then it sort of puts a greater responsibility on me to be even kinder with them?
but then again, if i want to treat all people as equal, why should i make exceptions for them? maybe it is time for them to simply grow up? and maybe it has nothing to do with them at all, and it is about me?
i think feeling inferior or feeling superior are two sides of the same coin: you feel somehow different than the rest of the world. it is a failure to aknowledge that you are just like everybody else, and you could be anyone else. and if i treat people differently, i will reinforce this belief in them.
all this elimination of garbage has made a lot of space for many new, good, happy things. good luck, love, happiness, contentness, wonderful new people and many many lessons and moments of insight have been coming to me. i think they have been coming because i have been inviting them to do so, and trying to keep my eyes, my ears my heart open for them.
morning phonecalls
my phone rang a while ago and it was a woman who said initially she was from my mobile phone company, and then turned out she was from some other company and trying to persuade me to change to that one. first she stated that "right now you have the connection for 8 cents a minute" without naming the monthly plan, so it was obvious that she doen't have my customer details and she is not from that mobile company... I answered my honest "i don't know" - I compare prices at the beginning, make my choice and then these details are wiped out of my mind.
then i asked like always with such phonecalls, where she had my number from ("from our list") and then what list that would be. she answered loudly and in an agressive tone "do you want to question me or do you want to start calling for cheaper from next month?!"
i said: "no, like this you won't get far with me. have a good day" and i hung up. I have done similarly the last times i received such a commercial call and certainly the number of these calls has been diminishing.
well, I have one thing to say: thank you Wen Do (this is a self defense system for women that teaches you foremostly to empower yourself).
yes, hopefully I will never have to defend myself physically, but I learned to say no and remove myself from all kinds of unpleasant situations without feeling guilty or helpless, be it annoying phone calls, gossiping neighbours, "friends" who are sucking the life out of me...
then i asked like always with such phonecalls, where she had my number from ("from our list") and then what list that would be. she answered loudly and in an agressive tone "do you want to question me or do you want to start calling for cheaper from next month?!"
i said: "no, like this you won't get far with me. have a good day" and i hung up. I have done similarly the last times i received such a commercial call and certainly the number of these calls has been diminishing.
well, I have one thing to say: thank you Wen Do (this is a self defense system for women that teaches you foremostly to empower yourself).
yes, hopefully I will never have to defend myself physically, but I learned to say no and remove myself from all kinds of unpleasant situations without feeling guilty or helpless, be it annoying phone calls, gossiping neighbours, "friends" who are sucking the life out of me...
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
moments of my days
today while i was sitting, my heart broke open and i was filled with love. jesus christ superstar, i wouldnt know words to describe how intense but also how natural that felt. within seconds i was shedding silent tears until i calmed down and went back to counting my breaths. and then it just happened a second time! i had been doing this heart-opening gesture for a few weeks now so maybe i was just inviting this to happen, and i knew this is something i need to do right about now... after my heart-opening, I still had maybe another 20 mins until my timer would go off... although i must admit i was really tempted to get up already because i thought, well, after these two experiences, what else can i get out of this sitting? it would be almost greedy to continue, and i can spare myself the numbness of the legs. but dilligent as i try to be i continued and well, i was "rewarded" again, and after a while i felt like i was expanding or maybe melting into my room.
yesterday i originally had my guitar lesson and then my singing class. my singing class was cancelled so i spontaneously went to dinner with a friend instead. on my way to meet her i was so happy. i had had a great guitar lesson and it was so sunny and warm and everything was happy and full of contentness.
i was humming away amazing grace as i walked the streets and took the tram to our meeting point. some people were giving me strange looks and i suppose it was because i was singing and not because of my undone hair. i realised that obviously nowadays it is seen as normal to hum and head bang away to your ipod or mp3 player, or if you sing or perform for coins on the street or even if you talk to an invisible headphone in your ear... but someone who is simply happy and is enjoying this amazing sunny afternoon turning into a balmy summer announcing night, is considered rather weird and given weird looks. well you didn't think i would let the looks bother me, did you, i continued my singing and my smiling, trying to give the people feelings that this is ok, no need to feel uncomfortable. then the situation got better and only then did i notice this boy, around 8 or 9, who was right in front of me and looking at me and listening to my song and smiling at me. and then i smiled back and sang just for him and knew my song had been worth it all the way - and the evening with my friend was beyond lovely, too
yesterday i originally had my guitar lesson and then my singing class. my singing class was cancelled so i spontaneously went to dinner with a friend instead. on my way to meet her i was so happy. i had had a great guitar lesson and it was so sunny and warm and everything was happy and full of contentness.
i was humming away amazing grace as i walked the streets and took the tram to our meeting point. some people were giving me strange looks and i suppose it was because i was singing and not because of my undone hair. i realised that obviously nowadays it is seen as normal to hum and head bang away to your ipod or mp3 player, or if you sing or perform for coins on the street or even if you talk to an invisible headphone in your ear... but someone who is simply happy and is enjoying this amazing sunny afternoon turning into a balmy summer announcing night, is considered rather weird and given weird looks. well you didn't think i would let the looks bother me, did you, i continued my singing and my smiling, trying to give the people feelings that this is ok, no need to feel uncomfortable. then the situation got better and only then did i notice this boy, around 8 or 9, who was right in front of me and looking at me and listening to my song and smiling at me. and then i smiled back and sang just for him and knew my song had been worth it all the way - and the evening with my friend was beyond lovely, too
Sunday, April 25, 2010
i love my new hellos
“Why can't we get all the people in the world that we really like together and then just stay together? I guess that wouldn't work. Someone would leave. Someone always leaves. Then we would have to say good-bye. I hate good-byes. I know what I need. I need more hellos.” charles schulz as snoopy
i had such a beautiful day turned night... thank you!
and it is wonderful sitting with a new friend, even if you sit different styles!
as a highlight, the veg kebabs were as delicious as they looked gorgeous!
i had such a beautiful day turned night... thank you!
and it is wonderful sitting with a new friend, even if you sit different styles!
as a highlight, the veg kebabs were as delicious as they looked gorgeous!
Friday, April 23, 2010
after class snack
today after my guitar lesson - btw i m developing some great callous skin on my right thumb from strumming barethumb instead of holding the plektrum!-
so yes, after my guitar lesson, i stopped to get my usual pretzel, only today instead of saying i wanted the pumpkin seed pretzel i asked for the sunseeds pretzel. just a verbal mistake there but i must have asked for it with loud enthusiasm and longing expectation, i was hungry after all and this is a favourite treat for me. as i m getting my pretzel i hear the next person who was standing right behind me ask for the same kind of pretzel with a descernible enthusiasm in his voice and then the next one after him, and then someone who had come after i had ordered my pretzel also asked for the same, probably influenced by the second guy after me.
now there was the law of three happening right there in front of me. and funny how proof comes in front of your eyes when you have long stopped looking or needing it...
so yes, after my guitar lesson, i stopped to get my usual pretzel, only today instead of saying i wanted the pumpkin seed pretzel i asked for the sunseeds pretzel. just a verbal mistake there but i must have asked for it with loud enthusiasm and longing expectation, i was hungry after all and this is a favourite treat for me. as i m getting my pretzel i hear the next person who was standing right behind me ask for the same kind of pretzel with a descernible enthusiasm in his voice and then the next one after him, and then someone who had come after i had ordered my pretzel also asked for the same, probably influenced by the second guy after me.
now there was the law of three happening right there in front of me. and funny how proof comes in front of your eyes when you have long stopped looking or needing it...
Thursday, April 22, 2010
life is so good
yep. i'm feeling so good lately, it's amazing.
of course, i have no problems like "other people" do. i am extra lucky. i dont have to worry about food, clothes, shelter, bills, catching the train on time, or any health problems now or in the future. obviously, not only am i extra lucky but my luck and happiness came with a lifetime guarantee! besides myself, i never have to worry about any of my friends, or my family, whether they are healthy, happy, or have all they need. nothing clouds the blue skies of my days.
now if only i could get all the people who are richer, healthier, sexier, smarter and more successful than me, and even those who are and/or have less than me, to quit their moaning about every little or big thing and simply enjoy their life just as much! then feelings of jealousy or inadequacy upon seeing other people happy would subside, too.
because when i cherish the air i breathe, i "grant" everybody else the right to be happy, lucky, whole...
of course, i have no problems like "other people" do. i am extra lucky. i dont have to worry about food, clothes, shelter, bills, catching the train on time, or any health problems now or in the future. obviously, not only am i extra lucky but my luck and happiness came with a lifetime guarantee! besides myself, i never have to worry about any of my friends, or my family, whether they are healthy, happy, or have all they need. nothing clouds the blue skies of my days.
now if only i could get all the people who are richer, healthier, sexier, smarter and more successful than me, and even those who are and/or have less than me, to quit their moaning about every little or big thing and simply enjoy their life just as much! then feelings of jealousy or inadequacy upon seeing other people happy would subside, too.
because when i cherish the air i breathe, i "grant" everybody else the right to be happy, lucky, whole...
13. Get Your Personal Needs Met, Once and for All. If you have unmet needs, you’ll attract others in the same position.
15. Tolerate Nothing. When you put up with something, it costs you; unnecessary costs are unattractive.
16. Show Others How to Please You. Don’t make them guess.
17. Endorse Your Worst Weakness. When you can accept and honor the worst part of yourself, you’re more accepting of others.
18. Sensitize Yourself. The more you feel, the more you’ll notice and respond to the many opportunities in the present.
15. Tolerate Nothing. When you put up with something, it costs you; unnecessary costs are unattractive.
16. Show Others How to Please You. Don’t make them guess.
17. Endorse Your Worst Weakness. When you can accept and honor the worst part of yourself, you’re more accepting of others.
18. Sensitize Yourself. The more you feel, the more you’ll notice and respond to the many opportunities in the present.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
every rose has its thorn, just like every night has its dawn.
i found vegan nutella. there goes the myth of a healthy diet ;-))
i guess i should give up sugar, eventually.
i guess i should give up sugar, eventually.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
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