the desert and the oasis

Once upon a time there was a girl who loved the Desert and she travelled to faraway places to have the pleasure to meet it and be alone with it.One day she met another girl who had been to the Desert alone a lot as well. They recognised each other immediately the moment they took off their sunglasses to shake hands. They went to the park and danced all night. Later they decided to go back to the Desert together and after they had walked a long while they sat down across each other only to see their Desert had been an Oasis all along. Once upon a time there was a girl she loved the Desert much she travelled to faraway places to have the pleasure to meet it and be alone with it. One day she met another girl she loved the Desert as well They recognised each other the moment they took off their sunglasses to shake hands. They went to the park the danced all night in the moonlight. they decided to go back to the Desert together they walked a while under (the) stars sat across each other and saw their Desert had been an Oasis in all time

thank you, Teachers...

early this year i started my training as a shiatsu therapist. as with all the important things in life... it was a pure coincidence. i had gotten one of those discount coupons for a shiatsu session with a certain therapist named mario. i didn't know what shiatsu was. i had never had a shiatsu treatment. but curious as i am, i had to try it. i ordered the coupon. i looked up the therapist's website. so he was a teacher at a shiatsu school. and they even had an intro night, which he was giving the following week. i went. i walked out knowing i had found the exact thing i didnt know i was looking for. signed up the same night. fast forward ten months later. thanksgiving. evening class. me. three other advanced students. mario. wonderful class. at the end of the class, another of my favourite Teachers, ursula, came by to prepare the room for her morning class. i stood at the entrance watching my two Teachers rearranging the mats. ursula notice me and came to me, as i was wearing my hat. she said how are you my dear, while she was straightening my turtleneck. i said i am very happy. oh good, glad to hear that. and now i m going to straighten your hat so you can be even happier, and she straightened my hat, so lovingly, and said, be happy, be in the moment, and then at the same time we both said "cuz we never know how long it's going to last". and i said right now i am very happy for you are my Teacher, and she kinda didnt expect that, and i looked straight into her big steel blue eyes and i said THANK YOU and then mario came to say goodnight and i said "you know i wouldnt have become involved in shiatsu if it weren't for you, right?" and now mario is a bit of a shy guy and he looked away so charmingly as he does and when he looked back i looked straight into his big glacier blue eyes and i said THANK YOU i've been blessed with so many wonderful Teachers in this life...

is that what you greek people do?

a darling friend informed me yesterday morning that she was ill and staying home from work until end of the week. i asked her to recount the medicine the doctor had given her, ordered a eucalyptus bath and bedrest or i'd spank her, and said i was going to be over at her house that night or the next morning. this morning i was over. i didn't stay much - just long enough to make her some tea, tidy the kitchen, make her eat some fruit with her medicine, cook some soup for lunch, make her some more tea and see that she sips it while entertaining her with descriptions my latest sex dreams, tuck her snuggly on the sofa with books and more tea... when it was time to go i got up, hugged her and kissed her forehead, not without ordering another eucalyptus bath before bed. she stopped me halfway to the door. -so, is that the greek thing to do when people are sick? -what like, bust into their house at 9 in the morning and make them drink tea until it squirts out their ears? -no, you know, come to their house and take care of them? is that what greek people do? i really did have to think about this for a moment. was i trespassing cultural limits here? was i intruding? it didnt even cross my mind to ask whether it was ok to go by. i just stated it as a fact. was this too much? i mean, although she did catch a lung infection, she wasn't exactly dying. -i'm not sure as to which upbringing is responsible for it - i think that's what friends do. oh, i'll get the trash on my way out.

titles... pfff!!! by tra, (http://tra.shoe.org/) so i was telling a friend today i feel like after 30 years of being int he total darkness, in the last couple years it's like "enlightenment" has been accelerating. which is really weird cuz i saw that docu the other day saying a similar thing... so at least i m in company with my weirdness. that's what counts eh. i ll try to put it in a image. say i was in a dark room, without any light. and now, as if the blinds have been ever so lightly loosened, and a couple faint rays come in inbetween the holes. maybe i still can't really see the picture, but compared to the absolute darkness of the first 30 years, there is something to see, even if it's just shadows. i was telling this to my friend and wondering, will another couple rays have sneaked in through the shutters in another 30 years, maybe i can see more than shadows, maybe then i can even see some form... like, how cool would that be... what a revelation.... it's nothing compared to what is really there but it's everything compared to nothing and double as many faint rays of light before... remember you must compare it to the absolute darkness... whether there is such a thing as absolute darkness or absolute anything, that's kinda another discussion... it always begins with curiosity... maybe curiosity is the seed of light in the "absolute" darkness... the "possibility" of light... say you been paddling along like one of those underground mice whatever they called, just fretting around really, never taking a breaths break to think about what you re doing or why or where to or anything, you re just running digging sniffling... and then, you stop. and ask yourself, hey, what's up? and this questioning, turning the attention to yourself opens the world to you. (never mind about actually getting answers eventually) today was a day so intense, cant remember when i had one like this last. i went to my yoga class in the morning... to say goodbye to my beloved yoga teacher. omg she was sniffing tears every other exercise. she has the handkerchief usually to wipe sweat and today she was wiping tears. i had to be really strong and not cry. i didnt completely manage. my one eye was crying the whole time. but only one. the other stayed brave. she gave us a three hour class, she dried us out like sponges (please someone remind me the better verb... wrigle?)... all my organs are super detoxing right now. i kept thinking, ahhh this is haaard!!!! "oooh, it's hard hard hard ay ay ay ayyyyy shhhh!!!!" a couple months ago, the various thoughts crossing my mind were "fuck it, that's too hard!" "i cant do this!" "this class is too difficult for me!" "boohoo, i m too fat to be here!!" today: "ahhh it's so hard!!! ay!" "come on knee cap, pull up my arch!" or "i know you re a really stubborn trapezius but i m not gonna give up till you do!" talking to my various body parts and organs has become a totally normal daily thing. just like talking to my pets or my plants. Sometimes, Teachers have to leave. We are sad for a while. Then we throw our shoulders back stick our heart out and wear them with pride. With every teacher we carry, we become Lighter. Do we really carry them or do they carry us? So after that, I had to run to my practice where i had arranged with a friend to give her shiatsu... i had a lovely practice experimenting with something and gaining knowledge... she is going to have a week from hell and she will have to work hard but i m rather positive about the outcome... i convinced her to go to the river afterwards and it was an absolutely fabulous swim... the water was hardly cooling, there was no current, i almost had to swim to move along... then we installed ourselves at the "women only deck" gazing at pretty female views around us and the people floating in the river underneath i had left my stuff at the practice and only went to the river with my bathsuit, skirt and tshirt over... after the swim i didnt want to wear the wet bathsuit on my skin so i went back to the practice with clothes on but no underwear lol... luckily it's only like 20 mins walk.... but i had to walk through the red light district with clearly not wearing a bra hahaaa after i had put on some underwear on i had to run to my date... yes well i wasnt gonna go to a date without underwear!!! she is lovely by the way and there i was going into the water again with her, this time in the lake, it was getting dark and we floated out in the lake, that was simply amazing, nothing but looking at a cloudy sky and hearing to my own breaths volumized through the water... like time had stopped, like nothing existed beyond this one breath and this one sky... and she, somewhere behind me, next to me, was i must say a nice addition talking of hearing.... i have gotten my hearing gradually back... a few days back i randomly realised i could hear the cicades.... i was flabbergasted... i never knew there were cicades in switzerland... and an uhu bird outside my practice in the freaking middle of the city.... and one afternoon i could hear the breeze through leaves at home... and my cat is snoring incessantly man and he prefers to sleep right next to my pillow! omg a world coming back alive.... i was told with scarred eardrums and what not... and the recurring ear infections... bla bla... not wet the ears... bla bla... no more swimming for you... bla bla... take these good antibiotics, they're gonna kick the infections' ass, ah yes, hopefully before my immune system's?! pfff!!! ok i think that's it with my rant... haven't written in a while so just making up for it boooh aaa hahaaa

what my life looks like

my life is really blessed.

for starters, i am healthy. i am healthy physically, psychologically and emotionally. there's nothing wrong with me! except for the occasional cold and such. my support and movement apparatus shows no impairement, my organs are doing their job, my senses are functioning, my brain processes impulses in a satisfactory manner and my mind is not playing tricks on me.

I do not have things from my past weighing on me either - i've worked them out in long processes of understanding forgiveness and self love.

i am financially healthy, too, my living expenses are covered adequately and i have no debt while I am training in the profession I chose to follow for my future.

i have a handful of really close friends - their presence even from a distance is invaluable. although i live abroad, i have family close to me in the person of my flatmate who is also my ex husband. together we have four beautiful cats that show me their love and acceptance day in and day out. I have three of the most loving and supportive siblings anyone could wish for and a mother so crazy and out of touch with reality that she is charming in her own right. and how could I forget my spiritual family who are my rocks when it comes to living faith love and compassion. I also have a bunch of interesting, fun, witty, people in my life to hang around with.

aside from my personal relationships, I have met wonderful teachers who've given me a push on my way. my shiatsu teachers, my yoga teachers and all my past "teachers" who include a much wider category of individuals than education professionals.

I get to wake up from a restful warm sleep in the morning, be greeted by one or two furry tails and velvety wet noses, i stretch and yawn without any pain and climb down my high bed effortlessly...

that is already the blessing I start my days with.

γεια σας και χαρά σας.

καιρό έχουμε να τα πούμε, ε;

λοιπόν... ας τα πιάσω από την αρχή.
δλδ από την πρωτοχρονιά. παραμονή πρωτοχρονιάς πήγα στην κολλητούλα να φάμε φοντού. λιωμένο τυρί με κιρς είναι το φοντού, και πασπατεύεις μέσα στο μείγμα κομματάκια ψωμιού που τά χεις καρφώσει σε μια μακριά πηρούνα και το βγάζεις και το τρως. μετά που έχει στερέψει το μείγμα το τυρί κι έχετε αποφάει και όλη τη γαβάθα τα ψωμάκια κάθεσαι και ξύνεις το ξεροψημένο τυρί από τον πάτο του κακλόν. προφέρεται κανονικά στα ελβετικά κάκ-ε-λόν. το οποίο σε φάση μεγάλης ντίρλας το έχω μεταφράσει σε μακρύ σκατό. κακλόν λοιπόν λέγεται το κεραμεικό σκέυος που γίνεται όλη η τυροκατάσταση το οποίο το βάζεις πάνω από μια βάση με αυτά τα κεράκια τα ρεσώ για να μην κρυώνει το τυρί και στοκάρει. επίσης πάει μετά από κάθε μπουκο-τυρο-ψωμάκι και μια γουλιά κιρς ή ουίλιαμς *σναπς αχλάδι. πριν τη μασαμπούκα φυσικά έχεις πιει και τα κοκτεηλο-απαεριτίφ σου ρε παιδί μου. μετά που μπαίνει ο χρόνος είσαι ήδη ντίρλα αλλά εννοείται θα ανοίξεις και σαμπάνια, θα την πεις όλη από το μπουκάλι τριγυρνώντας στους δρόμους και μετά θα γυρίσεις σπίτι να πιεις και ό,τι έχει μείνει από σναπς γιατί ναι μεν καινούριος χρόνος αλλά η κατάσταση διαγράφεται η ίδια με του προηγούμενου χρόνου, διότι εσύ έχεις ντέρτια και θες την κολλητούλα κάργα αλλά... τέσπα.

μετά από αυτή την πρωτοχρονιά ήμουνα τέζα η τερέζα στο κρεβάτι καμιά βδομάδα.

μετά ανακάλυψα το σιάτσου.
από σπόντα, όπως τα περισσότερα πράγματα που μετά αποδεικνύονται σημαντικά στη ζωή μπας...

το ίδιο βράδυ γράφτηκα στη σχολή σιάτσου και μόλις τέλειωσα το δέυτερο επίπεδο. έχω πάρει φόρα και παίρνω όσα περισσότερα μαθήματα μπορώ. αυτά.

βαριέμαι τώρα να γράψω κι άλλα, πάω να φάω μπριζόλες. χοιρινές από γουρούνι, το βήγκαν τό κοψα την πρωτοχρονιά ως νιου γίαρς ρεζολούσιον.

How can I get rid of a pest flatmate who won't budge after a straightforward talk?

make him feel uncomfortable:

-invite all your lesbian, gay, transexual and otherwise queer friends and have them make out around the house including his room. have your shaven head butch friend with the bulgy biceps covered in tats to hit on him.

-ask your very devout buddhist friend to come and help you cleanse your home with a three hour long chanting session in chinese. ask the flatmate to join the both of you. explain she used to live in a monastery where they held week long chanting retreats.

-lock yourself in the shower ten mins before he usually takes his shower and let all the hot water run out, then come out naked and dripping while he waits at the door, showing your drooping boobs and praising the skin tightening benefits of cold water.

make bad noise:

-delay feeding your cats by an hour or two on sunday morning so they start meowing in a high pitch

-listen to your favourite station with the headphones on and sing along loudly and answer to whatever the producers are saying.

-start screaming as if you had a nightmare outside his door about three hours after he's gone to bed.

show him he is unwanted:

-invite friends, cook, eat and laugh loudly together, if he shows up pretends he's not even there

-ask him every day if he's found a new place already.

-leave a fake old looking black magic recipe titled "how to remove unwanted guests" in the kitchen next to a pot of foul smelling contents like old beans - plan it around the time he comes from work. go the extra mile and burn some baldrian outside the entrance door. when he comes in, say "oh, right on time for the final ingredient" and pick a hair from his head.

be a nerd:

stick notes in the kitchen, bathroom, entrance hall "remember to take down the lid please", "remember to take out the garbage", "hang your jacket straight please" etc

unplug his water boiler, toaster, shaving machine to save energy

start composting organic garbage in the kitchen to use for the balcony flowers


Even if it all fails, you will have so much fun until his lease is up!!!

2010... it was a very good year

it was a very good year.

it started off with an extremely painful arthritic bout.
there was some screaming and sweating in pain, and not being able to take two steps standing.

no wait, actually it went off watching an amazing firework show over the lake of zurich.

i went vegan.

then i learned how to swim properly.

then i learned how to break someone's nose, ribs, feet, tear a knee, shoulder or make them faint.

there was some good shouting.

then somebody showed me how to sit and count my breaths. it jump started a process of, not transformation, but shedding layers.

there was some crying.

then i met a couple nice girls and made friends with them.

then i met a wonderful girl and made her my closest friend.

so i made myself a nice little bunch of friends to hang out with regularly for the first time in over ten years.

i took some intro singing and guitar classes.

then i spent couple weeks studying for exams. i passed.

then i spent some time visiting my godparents and decluttering half a century of family history.

there was a lot of fudge, and a lot of shopping.

i did some hiking, and glacier swimming.

i got introduced to yoga by a diamond of a teacher.

i spent my first summer in switzerland, completely and thoroughly cherishing it.

i swam in the lake and let the river carry me.

i tried out summer workshops in ballet, flamenco, bollywood and belly dance. they were fun, but none intrigued me to more than a peek-week.

then i turned 31. my birthday was beautiful.

i was very excited to try out aikido but saw that it isn't for me. you want to hurt me, i want you raw steak. besides, the duck walk hurt my knees.

i tried out a few yoga schools, but haven't found my teacher yet.

i started asking myself, who am i, where am i going to.

so i went night swimming in athens with my sis and bro.
i reconnected with my mother.

i got another flatmate.

i moved to a room half the size.

i found something to do with my life. for now, you know.

there was a lot of healing, learning, trying out, growing, becoming, daring, discovering.

and a lot of muffins...

I need books and movies suggestions.

I have another six months with a lot of free time ahead of me and I would like to use it to catch up on books and movies.

So I have asked friends to recommend books and movies they think I would enjoy.

So far I got

Books
1. Miriam Toews "Summer Of My Amazing Luck" is about welfare Mom's living in a government housing project in Winnipeg. Her dialogue and outlook is hilarious.

2. Anita Brookner "Hotel Dulac" is a short read about an older woman counting up what her life has meant. Won the Booker for good reason.

3. Brothers Karamazov for the "onion analogy" if for nothing else.

4. Running With Scissors by Augusten Burroughs.

movies
If (1968)

i guess i m a difficult person.

I cannot stand whiners. Losers. Giveuppers. In fact, won'teventriers.

Those people who always have this miserable look about them, never smiling, or satisfied, not able to enjoy or appreciate. They find life shitty, nothing but shitty and they have to let everyone around them know just how shitty their miserable little life is.

They won't actually say it. They... perspire it. It is audible in their voice, legible in their walk. I cannot bear the stench off of their faces.

They attract drama into their life -well in fact, they do not wait until it comes to them, they would go after it even if they had to crawl. Sometimes they will even beg for it. That's what they do to entertain and, alas, distract themselves from this seemingly impossible practice of you know, living, day in and day out. Of course drama gives them so much more to whine about, more reasons to prove to themselves and everyone how bad they have it.

How they suffer. How they are done injustice. How god must have farted in their cot when they were babies. How nothing good ever comes to them, how people just use them, how their friends leave them, how their bosses don't appreciate all their hard work, how all the things they want don't just fly into their lap when they snip their fingers. Boo hoo.

You could give them happiness in a box, they would find something wrong about the box.

reasons to spend winter in juneau

Why spend winter in Juneau, Alaska (AK)


My alaskan family
Spending early morning sipping rooibos tea with Mother in the sun room
The family "puppy"!
The family cat, aka "Queen of the Universe"
Warm, friendly, laid back people
"Alaska time" means no stress, but things still get done on time
Going to the movies or bowling with my little sister
Doing the laundry in the new washer/tumbler
Northern Lights (no brainer)
18 hours of darkness on average every day
Juneau Art Galleries
January Sales at Annie Kaill's artsy store
Any class at Rainforest Yoga downtown
Private lessons with Gretchen at Rainforest Yoga
Kundalini Meditation with Hari Dev at Taproot Yoga on Sunday mornings
Midday Meditation at Shambala Center downtown
Lunches at the Hangar watching waterplanes taking off and landing
Breakfast at Paradise Café opposite Marine Park
Sushi at Canton House
Local Highschool stage plays, starring little sister mentioned above
Local University festivals and events
Juneau Symphony concerts
Playing wii at the TV room
Skating on frozen Auke Lake
Walking to the Mendenhall Glacier and back.
Living inside a Rainforest, for god's sake.
Living inside the most northern Rainforest on the planet.
Walking into the divinely smelling Alaska Fudge Company on a windy icy afternoon.
Fresh, still warm slice of Divinity Fudge from Alaska Fudge Company.
Looking up the sky at 4 o clock in the afternoon to a flood of stars.
Again, the Northern Lights.
Going to bed at 9 and waking up at 4.
Snow storms and listening to the chimes in the garden going mad
No electricity due to snow storm
Ordering pizza and watching movies with the whole family spread comfortably into sofas and armchairs
Enjoying a fire in the finnish fireplace
Teaching the puppy not to pull while taking him on a walk on icy slippery road.
Smoked Salmon... clam chowder... oven baked halibut...

Well, why the hell not?

I ve been doing an 8 week fitness challenge.
today was the first day of week four.

It has been far more than just about fitness.

I have cut down dramatically on the amount of time i spent - no, WASTE - online. unimaginable but - yes - i spent time away from my laptop - why, I even go for walks in the forest without taking my mobile phone with me!!

I also say "NO" more often, express my feelings and my opinion loudly and steer clear of lots of unpleasant people without a guilty conscience.

Back to the fitness part now.

I've been working towards the goal of holding a 30 min light jog by the end of the 8 weeks. I need a new goal though as already managed to hold a jog for 30 mins by the end of the third week. Should I train towards a one hour jog (increase duration) or a half hour run (increase intensity)?

Today I went up a nearby hill for a short hike. I had spent most afternoon lying in the sun on my balcony. When I was going up, everyone else was coming down. I was on the top before it got dark, having all the beautiful sunset colours for myself.

When I came back home and started tidying up and emptying the extra room, for which we found a flatmate who he is moving in with us this week. As I was moving a bookshelf and its contents, an amazing thing happened, some folders slipped from my hands and there were my beginner's italian, french and german books all spilled on the floor.

my first thought was: I still have these?
second: why do I still have these?
third: I'll never need those beginner's books again!

fourth: O-M-G - those beginner's books look so basic to me now that I am advanced in those languages - biology and maths will look so basic to me when, in another ten years' time, I have my degree!

Yes, this beautiful moment when I spilled some beginner's books on the floor and realised how familiar and self explanatory the knowledge within them looks to me now, gave me two things:

firstly, a pile of books to bring to the second hand store
and
secondly, a whole new perspective on my current study subjects - by the grace of god and lots and lots of more all nighters studying, I shall one day look back with my practice licence on the wall and by some miracle think genetic code biology and random variables statistics sound so very basic.
(I know, i know... dream on, right?... but that's the same thing some people said when I wanted to be fluent in multiple foreign languages one day!)

And then I send some tears and went to sit zazen.

Bless you.

όλα καλά.

όλα βαίνουν καλώς.

-Your house looks so empty. Did you just move in?
-No, I like big uncluttered spaces.

-Vas, is that all the clothes you own?
-Of course not! I have two more outfits.

-Vas, will you teach me to cook like that?
-Like what? Vegan?
-No, like without making a mess.

growing up to be a teacher

On the day she earned her qualifications Mother gave her this flashing keyring that said TEACHER on it and she thought that must be her way of getting back at her for all those times she shouted "You're no Teacher! You teach me NOTHING" at her. As Irony has it, later her little sister would spit those same words and she would just smile and blink the keyring with a lifted eyebrow. At this unshakeable proof of Wisdom her little sister would let out a snort and show her polished middle finger in response. What a smart young woman she'll grow up to be, she thought.

i want a woman... revisited

i want a woman... revisited


i wrote this list initially back in august 2008.

when i "revisited" it early may, i wasnt even looking. and then i fell in love. i didnt mean to. it happened against my will, if you ll have it... i was holding back... then... suddenly she came a little too close, and i was doomed. so now spending wsome time away fromher, and that should take care of itself...

right now i guess i m not "looking actively", but i sure keep my eyes open...



i want a woman who...

is generous and not afraid to give too much.

a woman who says please, thank you, and knows that the reason for good manners is a pleasant cohabitation.

a woman who is thankful, first and foremost, for her mere existence.

a woman who can appreciate beauty in everything, and learns valuable lessons even from difficulties.

who loves to talk, listen and who has an honest, straightforward and kind style of communication.

a woman who thinks of love making more like the highlight of her day, rather than a chore, and has a high sex drive. a woman whose kisses increase my heartbeats and who can deliver a bite that leaves me prey to her intentions.

a woman who is well-read and informed, has a critical and open mind and enjoys exchange of ideas -preferably ideas she comes up with on her own.

a woman who is interested in and wants to be part of contemporary culture and loves the arts.

a woman who is involved, with humanitarian, intellectual or artistic interests or background and possibly an activist of some sort.

a woman who makes use of her immune system and isn't afraid of dirt, germs and the like but tends to the cleanliness of her own space nonetheless.

a woman who will take a trail that doesn't exist, and will get up to her knees in icy waters or crawl in mud just to get a better view of a waterfall.

a woman who takes risks, but does not put herself in danger.

a woman who takes care of herself and doesn't need mothering, but purrs at her lover's nurturing.

a woman who is not jealous or threatened by the other important people in her partner's life.

a woman who will wonder, doubt, question, argument, agree or disagree respectfully and constructively.

a woman who loves different tastes of food, appreciates and enjoys a meal cooked just for her or other small, loving gestures.

a woman who will jump gladly into a relaxing bath for two, candles and all and let me massage and pamper her for hours.

a woman who is not afraid in the dark, because she's holding my hand.

a woman who likes to hold hands.

a woman who might write me a poem or bring me flowers, because it's Tuesday.

a woman who knows who she is, what she wants, or is in a perpetual process of finding out, and is proud of herself but not arrogant.

a woman who is out, most importantly to herself.

a woman who knows how to live and let live and who can, when all else fails, let go and let god.

a woman who is honest, goal-oriented, disciplined, concentrated and has a common sense.

a woman I can admire and look up to.

a woman who lives mostly smoke, drug and alcohol free and leads a more or less healthy and active lifestyle.

a woman who reflects on her emotions, reactions, needs and wishes.

a woman who loves cats, of any size, or even better has a cat personality herself...

a woman who doesnt have bad-mannered dog(s). a woman who has well-mannered children, if any.

a woman who wants to see the world and is up for an adventure but also has a comfortable, functional, cosy and tastefully decorated home to return to, spend time alone, time for two or to entertain friends.

a woman who enjoys a playful exchange of sarcastic niceties.

a woman that will fascinate me and for whom I'll fall deeper over time.

a woman who is confident and reveals her true self from the beginning.

a woman whose smile brightens up my day and whose eyes I gladly and willingly get lost into. a woman whose arms are the safest and most comforting place in the world.

a woman who carries herself in an emancipated, sexy way and is more often than not on the androgenous or butchy side of the fence -a woman without a possessive, controlling or macho attitude.

a woman I will want to spend a long time with, a woman I would be happy and honoured to make a committment to.

a woman who will not fall low when it's over, someone I can consider a close friend when the romantic interest fades.

i love you because you take a moment to realise i'm teasing you, and that moment is hilarious

i love you because you are cute when you complain i don't have coffee

i love you because i bought some coffee for you even when that means i wont have your cute complaining

i love you because you ll never complain for not eating meat

i love you because the moment im in your arms i forget all about work and school and being dead tired

i love you because you rush to put fresh sheets on the bed while im taking a shower

i love you because i love to make love to you all night and get up with a grin and spring to my step

I LOVE YOU BECAUSE YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MODERN AND JAZZ DANCE

i love you because we dance so amazingly well together

i love you because you are you

i love you because of your cute nose

i love you because you re cute as a meercat and at the same time sexy as a lioness

i love you because there is no reason not to.

i love you because i couldn't find any reason not to, and i m not even going to try.

i love you because you are so adorable

i love you because i love you

i love you because i try but i cannot find specific reasons, my heart has decided on its own to love you, sneakily, without consulting me, without giving me a choice...

i love you because every time i look at you, i see beauty for the first time

last week there was a lot of studying, except on friday when i did some housekeeping, went swimming and then two friends came over and we cooked a lovely meal and watched movies... was a good night. the weekend was a bit of a rollercoaster and I got my period, but ended ok...

this week it's all about studying and friday morning I got an exam then another exam next week and done till august. well, sort of, because I will be studying some more during the time off, I want to sit maths in january instead of june, to even out the extra workload I'll get from february on.

I'm supposed to take english next august but I want to take physics instead. I'm fed up with english, been having all my school life, while I've never had physics and I think this is a huge gap in my general education. Who cares what rhythm a poem is, anyway? Either you get it, or you don't.

Some weeks ago I was at a workshop and I met a sweet girl, and I meant to ask her for coffee or sth, only at the end of the day I was so tired that I simply said bye-bye to everyone and left.

Then only last week it hit me, that maybe I could still contact her through the school... so I explained to the reception lady and asked to forward a message from me, and now I've heard back from her :) cool, huh? But now the girl is going away for two weeks, and then I will be away for five weeks. LOL. So we'll meet in July during the week I will be home to do laundry, host a grill party and restock on sunscreen before I leave for Crete.

I'm more or less figuring out my daily plan for my vacation, I will be there two weeks just to be with my family and then my ex hub is joining us for three more weeks and we'll do a bit of sightseeing. Oh, and as soon as I'm done with exams I'm learning
[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q269XQuhnnI]this song[/url]

purse contents

more cards than money in there i'll tell you!

-two debit cards from bank account and post account
-two supermarket loyalty cards
-library card
-newspaper subscription card (it gives you discount on some concerts, movies, cultural events and stuff)
-movie theatre discount card
-student card
-long term half price public transport card
-public transportation month card for the zones from my house to downtown (bought at half price)
-swimming pool card

-health care card
-emergency rescue card
-organ donor card

-a wet towelette

-customer card from the optician with the numbers of my shortsightedness printed on it
-customer cards from two different beauticians, a cosmetic shop, a shoe shop and a bead shop
-two customer cards from clothes shops i've only bought once from, years ago, which reminds me the card from the fair trade shop i actually do buy from never arrived, lol


money wise it's 190 francs in paper and close to 20 francs in coins (I'm feeling totally rich today!) PLUS 25 francs in supermarket vouchers, yay!

there is also a fine ticket for getting caught on the train without a valid card (my card had run out the day before and i thought it was still that date...bugger... the fine is 80 francs...)

and then on the tight pocket of my purse there are a few more "worthless" stuff:

a post-it from my psychotherapist from many years ago with a date for a session written on it.

a battered ten franc note that i found a couple months ago on the street and kept it as good luck

one old and one new cinema ticket from the first time i went to a movie with a friend that turned out precious in the course of time

my guitar teacher's bank details for paying the bill


what i just noticed is there is no formal identification in my purse. the health card would be the most formal of them but no proper ID card.

there are also no airline mile cards.

jeesh i'm trying to stuff all the cards back in and i can't close it now! but it closed before!?